Do pigeons know how to use Twitter?

Posted: March 29, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: SONGS | Tags: , , , , , | 4 Comments

Maurice Chevalier first sang Louise in the 1929 movie Innocents of Paris. I love this song, but one line is baffling. Birds in the trees seem to Twitter Louise? Do most sparrows know how about Twitter?

LOUISE

S’Wonderful! Oh, it’s wonderful

To be in love with you.

Beautiful! You’re so beautiful

You haunt me all day through.

Every little breeze seems to whisper Louise

Birds in the trees seem to twitter “Louise.

Each little rose

Tells me it knows I love you, love you.

Every little beat that I feel in my heart,

Seems to repeat,

What I felt from the start,

Each little sigh

Tells me that I adore you, Louise.

Just to see and hear you

Brings joy I never knew

But to be so near you,

Thrills me through and through

Every little breeze seems to whisper Louise.

Birds in the trees seem to twitter Louise.

Each little rose

Tells me it knows I love you, love you.

Anyone can see why I wanted your kiss,

It had to be

But the wonder is this:

Can it be true, 
 someone like you could love me, Louise?

Don’t bring Lulu

Posted: March 28, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: SONGS | Tags: , , , , , | 2 Comments

 

My name is Lou Lou. My mum calls me Lulabelle and my brothers nicknamed me Bosom, or Bos when I was five because I had no boobs (go figure). They still call me that even though I am 39 and a half and three quarters and I have three kids of my own. That is my family’s sense of humour. This is another one of my theme songs. What is your theme song?

DON’T BRING LULU

(Lew Brown / Billy Rose / Ray Henderson)

Your presence is requested, wrote little Johnny White,

But with this invitation, there is a stipulation,

When you attend this party, you’ll be treated right, but

There’s a wild and wooly woman you boys can’t invite, now…

You can bring Pearl, she’s a darn nice girl, but don’t bring Lulu.

You can bring Rose with the turned up nose, but don’t bring Lulu.

Lulu always wants to do, what we boys don’t want her to,

When she struts her stuff around, London Bridge is falling down,

You can bring cake or Porterhouse steak, but don’t bring Lulu.

Lulu gets blue and she goes cuckoo like the clock on the shelf,

She’s the kind of smartie, who breaks up every party,

Hullabalooloo, don’t bring Lulu; I’ll bring her myself.

We all went to the party, real high-toned affair,

Then along came Lulu, wild as any Zulu,

She started into Charleston, and how the boys did stare, but

When she did the hula-hula, then she got the air, now…

You can bring Flo, her dad’s got dough, but don’t bring Lulu

You can bring Lil, she’s an awful pill, but don’t bring Lulu

Lulu has the reddest hair, auburn her and henna there.

How can we boys keep our heads?

Bulls go wild when they see red.

You can bring peas and crackers and cheese, but don’t bring Lulu

When she gets sore and slams the door, the plates fly off the shelf.

She can make a fella wild on sasparilla

Hullabaloo loo, don’t bring Lulu, she’ll come here herself.

You can bring ham and crackers and jam, but don’t bring Lulu

Lulu goes wild, and when she’s wild

She climbs upon the shelf.

She can make a pastor be a dancing master.

Hullabaloo loo, don’t bring Lulu

I’ll bring her myself.

Raising Amazonia

Posted: March 24, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Parenting | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I am raising a small tribe of Amazonians. Notable queens of the Amazons are Penthesilea, who participated in the Trojan War, and her sister Hippolyte, whose magic girdle, given to her by her father, was the object of one of the labours of Hercules. Amazonian raiders were often depicted in battle with Greek warriors in classical art. The Amazons have become associated with various historical peoples throughout the Roman Empire. Their name has become a term for woman warriors.

When my youngest daughter is Prime Minister I’ll advise her to have every male over the age of 25 rounded up and sent to an island. We’ll keep men aged 18 to 25 in pens for breeding, retiring them once they become older. I’ll make a great political consultant. Is my first policy statement too extreme?

Lou Lou

Posted: March 21, 2011 | Author: | Filed under: Single | Tags: , , , , , , | 2 Comments

My name is Lou or more accurately Lou Lou. A friend told me that Lou Lou is a euphemism for vagina. Actually I was christened Louise (yes, I was christened in a posh frock which I did a big wee all over), but people only called me that when I had done something wrong; I got used to LOUISE being yelled in a cranky tone of voice. So 15 years ago I changed it to Lou Lou by deed poll. So I’m a grown woman with a little girl’s name. I have three theme songs. Don’t Bring Lulu because my sister was well behaved and I was a wild child so I tend to go a bit nuts at social functions. The second one is Louise, my dad used to sing it to me when I was little. Only my family get away with calling me Louise (just). And I’m a single mother, so this song below is another one of my theme songs.

SKIP TO MY LOU

I lost my partner, what’ll I do?

I lost my partner, what’ll I do?

I lost my partner, what’ll I do?

Skip to my Lou, my darlin’.

Lou, Lou, skip to my Lou,

Lou, Lou, skip to my Lou,

Lou, Lou, skip to my Lou,

Skip to my Lou, my darlin’.

I’ll find another one, prettier than you,

I’ll find another one, prettier than you,

I’ll find another one, prettier than you,

Skip to my Lou, my darlin’

Lou, Lou, skip to my Lou,

Lou, Lou, skip to my Lou,

Lou, Lou, skip to my Lou,

Skip to my Lou, my darling