Unmothered

On Mother bothering Sunday I realise that although I no longer have a mother, I can share the gifts she gave me

I can embarrass my teenager with my fashion choices

I can be a loving presence with sick children

I can swim with my head out of the water

I can talk to cats on my walk

I can deliver a lengthy sermon to the kids who have grown too old to live at home

I can hand-feed an animal who is in pain

I can argue about politics

I can sing along to corny, nostalgic music

I can read books and impart their wisdom

I can kiss dogs at the dog park and frighten their owners

I can dance in the garden of my dreams

thank you dearest mother


Mama said knock you out

As my 87 year old mother’s brain drifts further away into dementia, I realise that I don’t have much time left with her.Yesterday my kids and I took her for a lovely beach walk in a place where I spent a lot of time misbehaving as a teenager. So today I’m celebrating some of the gifts my mama gave me. Thanks to my mum I spent my childhood listening to great singers and story tellers. My mum has a wonderful voice and she loved singing to me when I was small. When ‘Songs In The Key of Life’ came out we would sing along to Stevie Wonder together. Love you mumma, thanks for your sense of humour and your songs


Champion Mothering

I’ve just been overseas on holiday. I had a break from the hospitals I work at which really helped me understand how lucky I am. I have a great job, my health, three well kids and tons of friends. The mothers I encounter in the hospitals where I work aren’t so lucky. These women are true champions. If there were a parenting Olympics they would win every medal and no one would question whether they were on performance enhancing drugs. Their events are the unglamorous side of mothering. Aiding your child in hospital is not something they do to gain kudos or attention or to show their children off in public.

These women daily win gold medals for most hours of sleep deprivation, after months spent on fold out chairs beside their children’s beds.

Their silver medals are for enduring what most parents avoid. Watching your child in excruciating pain and not being able to do anything about it except buzz the nurses and doctors for more pain meds is an event I don’t want to be a part of.

They gain bronze for leaving the hospital at all hours, early morning to late at night to find something else for their child to eat or to go shopping for toys that will distract their children from pain when they could be resting.

Some of them even manage to have a shower and brush their hair or put on a bit of lippy. I can’t manage that some days.

They could whinge all day long (I would) but they don’t. They are funny and resilient and strong and they sing and laugh with us when they could be crying in a corner. I feel humble in their presence. They are goddesses walking the earth. I will start a new religion to worship these ladies, and the nurses who serve them day and night.


Happy Mother’s Day – A prayer for all the mothers

According to Freud it’s the role of the mother to mess with the child’s psyche and I’ve been doing my share. So today I have a prayer that mothers can keep our sanity and sense of humour while parenting.

Today I got homemade craft for Mother’s Day and cards that read I love yu, you’re the bestest moummy in the hole world. Mother’s Day is well timed. Usually by May most mothers I know have had enough of child rearing thus Mother’s Day is planned so we don’t give up mothering and take the little blighters back to the pet shop.

May your day be filled with kisses.

May you go to the toilet in peace

May your day be a tantrum-free zone

And may Santa, The Easter Bunny and the tooth fairy take away the whinge-gene your children inherited from their father.

A PRAYER FOR SINGLE MOTHERS

May the dead beat dad finally give you some cash.

May your ex’s white trash girlfriend treat your kids well.

And may the Child Support Agency catch up with those who are avoiding their maintenance payments.

AMEN