The silly season is upon us. Hello Santa, Merry Christmas and Happy Channukah. This has been an exhausting, challenging, mad year for many of my loved ones. Peace to all.
JUDY GARLAND and PRINCE PHILLIP
Prince Philip: the patron saint and world record holder of the worst cases of foot in mouth disease – multiple outbreaks.
news.com.au has compiled a list of his greatest foot in mouth moments.
1. “How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them through the test?”
To a driving instructor in Scotland.
2. “If you stay here much longer, you’ll all be slitty-eyed.”
To a group of British students in China in 1986.
3. “Do you still throw spears at each other?”
To indigenous leader William Brin during a visit to the Aboriginal Cultural Park in Queensland, 2002.
4. “You look like you’re ready for bed!”
To the President of Nigeria, who was wearing traditional robes.
5. “If it has four legs and is not a chair, has wings and is not an aeroplane, or swims and is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it.”
To a World Wildlife Fund meeting in 1986.
6. “You managed not to get eaten then?”
To a British student trekking in Papua New Guinea in 1998.
7. “Aren’t most of you descended from pirates?”
To an inhabitant of the Cayman Islands.
8. “You are a woman, aren’t you?”
To a Kenyan woman in 1984 after she gave him a present
9. “Do you know they’re now producing eating dogs for the anorexics?”
To a blind, wheelchair-bound woman who was with her guide dog.
10. “It looks as though it was put in by an Indian.”
Prince’s verdict on a fuse box he noticed during a tour of a Scottish factory in 1999