As 2017 is ending it is compulsory to make a list of achievements, resolutions and groceries. As a word class highly qualified inspo fitspo marketing guru and on trend innovative disruptive full of it social media influencer professional product placement specialist, I also like to make predictions on what will be hip and cool next week.

The big trends of 2018 will be:
Teens discovering original songs which are better than cover versions recorded by No One With Original Talent contestants

All you can eat pickled onions with plastic cheese will feature on TV cooking shows

Footy socks with thongs will be huge in Paris and Engadine

Jail time for anyone using the hashtags disruptor, innovator or influencer

Fabulous LGBTQIA weddings

Smug coupled up parents will learn that single mothering helps kids learn to be independent

Women in power

Natural lips

Brady bunch families will thrive when property prices plummet

Wearing undies in summer will be abolished due to global warming

Footy teams taking performance-enhancing drugs may win a championship

It will be illegal for teenaged Katy Perry fans to wear 80s metal T-shirts

Americans will discover that guns kill a lot of people

Researchers will find a cure for politicians

(C) Lou Pollard 2017