Creepy

Some people say that Halloween is too American and shouldn’t be celebrated in Australia, but Halloween is a great day for single mothers. Our kids get spoilt with kilos of sugar and other people pay for it. On October 31, kids of single mothers are also being trained to beg in the streets. In the past week I’ve encouraged my youngest to stop brushing her hair so she’s perfected her poor urchin look.

I really wanted my teenager to have a happy costume for Halloween, so I dressed her in a white shift dress and painted a big red line down the middle of her face. Most people don’t guess that her costume is a negative pregnancy test.

Then I decided to scare my ex when he turned up to pick up the kids on Halloween evening so I’m wearing a t-shirt saying Real Men Pay Child Support.

Happy Halloween, bring on the treats.


A moment so rare

Three short years ago we were dressing up and celebrating your 40th birthday. You were the Queen of the ball that night and now you’ve already left us. And the only way I can contact you is to turn on Smooth FM and wait until a really corny tune comes on and sing my heart out like we used to do together when we were in your car or trying to outdo each other at karaoke. We miss you so, precious sunshine, funny witty friend, devoted mother. I see you when the sun lights up the evening sky across the sea and your songs come on the radio. Shine on beautiful friend, thank you for inspiring me to do good work in the world


Never smile at a crocodile

Apparently today is Reptile Awareness Day. I didn’t know there was a day held especially to recognise ex mother in laws and some of the toads I’ve been out with. One of the best things about divorce is shedding the asps attached to exes, it’s very ssss-satisfying when you no longer have to spend your time with ssss-snakes. Some species of reptile need to be threatened with extinction. Where are my crocodile skin shoes?


Gurl power

Today is the UN International Day of the Girl child to recognise girls’ rights and the unique challenges girls face around the world. This year’s theme is Empowering Adolescent Girls: Ending the Cycle of Violence. Girls are persecuted, oppressed, stifled and silenced, and in many places girls aren’t allowed to have opinions or a voice. Over 66 million girls around the world are denied an education, simply because they were born a girl. Nobel Prize winner Malala Yousafzai has been brave enough to stand up to extremists and speak about the fight for girls to have an education.

Consider these facts;
1 in 7 girls is married before the age of 15
Every 60 seconds a girl dies giving birth
Girls are persecuted more than any other political or religious group
Around 90% of child workers are girls aged 12-17
Girls are three times more likely to suffer from malnutrition than boys
One in every four girls are sexually abused by the age of 18

Of all the illiterate people in the world today, two-thirds are female and over 90 percent live in developing countries. Educating girls and women is widely acknowledged as the most powerful and effective way to address global poverty. Women who finish secondary school earn more money, have smaller, healthier families, and are more likely to educate their own children, breaking the cycle of illiteracy in one generation.

It doesn’t have to be like this. We can make a difference by donating money to charities like roomtoread.org


Magnificent moments in mothering part 576

In a rush to get to work a few weeks ago I forgot to send my youngest child to a school excursion in the rain with a few minor details: a) a raincoat b) sensible shoes c) a water bottle d) a back pack she could carry e) an umbrella I may as well have sent her in the nude. Beautiful goddess teacher dressed her in garbage bag couture so my girl stayed dry and shared some of her water with my child. Thank God for teachers and their ability to do what is best for the child, I worship them all. And there was no email to the silly mother saying, ‘you are a goose, what were you thinking?’ Today on World Teachers’ Day (UN approved) I’d like to thank my children’s teachers for everything they have done to enable my kids to be functioning members of society. They work hard for little pay and inspire our kidlets in so many ways. Teachers I love youse all. I am so lucky to be a part of a caring school community. Frank Sinatra – (Would You Like To) Swing On A Star