I’m hoping and praying that when I return to Australia we will have a parliament made up of a diverse group of female and male politicians, but I fear that nothing has changed. I should look on the bright side; another long torturous federal election campaign is over. There was almost a double dissolution, a budget, lots of pontifimacating about, “jobs and growth,” and eighty billion weeks of campaigning buffoons to endure.
I met a man who reminded me that voting is a privilege. “In my home country I wasn’t allowed to vote,” he told me.
Every night on TV we suffered idiots in suits who protect their mates and do very little to turn us into a clever country. Having watched them run a campaign in 2015, what disturbs me most about the Liberal party male power machine is not their political views but their lack of empathy. I didn’t hear any of them speak about helping their fellow humans in a real way. That’s a motherhood statement.
I learnt a lot standing as a politician in 2015. Don’t call swinging voters swingers at a community forum packed with senior citizens. Why did I want to be a politician? I got ahead of myself and imagined spending taxpayer dollars on homeless people, animal shelters and counselling for women victims of domestic violence. I met David Gonski. A rich banker who lives in Point Piper who actually knows how to fix our education system so it is fair to all kids, and the bastard politicians won’t even listen to him.
If I ever venture into politics again, I’ll start the single mother party. I will be the minister for cramped housing, over breeding and goon bags. If current politicians can rort their way into helicopter travel, when I’m elected every child of a single mum will receive a pony. but maybe I’ll just throw a party. Only smart people who want to save the planet can come. You with me? My slogan: Single mothers like to party. BYO cask wine and Prozac.
Spoken and authorised by Lou Pollard for the Single Mothers Like to Party Party.
The individual whose vision encompasses the whole world often feels nowhere so hedged in and out of touch with his surroundings as in his native land.
Why don’t you vote for me?
Not everyone in North Sydney would pay to meet Bronwyn Bishop.
This Thursday April 21st and Friday April 22nd, I’m performing my funny new show all about Australian politics, Vote One Lou Pollard at the Factory Theatre in Marrickville for the 2016 Sydney Comedy Festival. In this election year, come along and hear my crazy tales of politics in North Sydney.
When the other candidates are a joke, vote for the comedian
In a month, I’m performing my fourth solo comedy show for the Sydney Comedy Festival at The Factory Theatre in Marrickville. I’ve written a show about my brief but dazzling foray into the political arena at last year’s North Sydney by election.
Vote One Lou Pollard
Written and authorised by Lou Pollard for the Single Mothers having a party Party
Buy tickets: Vote One show tickets
Today the people of North Sydney must decide who will represent them in Canberra in the House of Representatives. MP Joe Hockey retired early, which meant a by-election costing taxpayers approximately $1.5 million had to be held, even though there will be a federal election sometime next year. There are 13 candidates in today’s poll, ranging from strong independents to more of the same white males, to new faces in brand new parties, passionate about bringing new ideas to the Australian political landscape.
I’m really hoping the fine people of the lower North Shore vote for change, that they put their faith in a candidate with fresh ideas not the one with the huge budget for self-promotion and out-of-date policies. I hope they’ll vote for a candidate who wants to recognise indigenous people in our constitution, improve our environment, and make education, health and the arts as their top priorities and the woman who will best serve the electorate.
I’m the first official candidate for the Arts Party in the federal seat of North Sydney for the by-election to be held on Saturday December 5th.
No, I haven’t gone mad, I think that the only way to change the world is to do my best to make Australia a more creative, educated and cultured country, especially in an area that has been ruled by conservative male politicians for a very long time. There are 13 candidates standing, from the Bullet Train party to Clive Palmer’s PUP candidate and Fred Nile’s Christian Democrats. I’m hoping that the electorate is ready for someone different to the pale, balding males in blue suits. I’ve been learning a lot since I decided to run, and last weekend as I campaigned for the first time in North Sydney, I found that the locals are sick of party politics and pettiness getting in the way of good decision making.
There are a lot of small independent parties and candidates running and the incumbent party have a lot of money to spend on focus groups, calling their constituents and marketing. I’m hoping one of the parties will start a juicy smear campaign and the fun will really begin.
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you – Author Unknown
Here’s a list of all the candidates, I’m number one on the ballot (really the luck of the draw)
If you live in North Sydney please vote for me so I can make some real changes. And when it comes to my opponents, in the words of one of my favourite comedians:
Don’t vote, it only encourages them – Billy Connolly