Apparently you have to feed kids good nutrition to help ’em grow. But frankly, I’m sick of cooking. Once upon a time I worked with a woman selling merchandise who wasn’t brilliant at customer service. We used to jokingly say to her, “This shop would run smoothly if these stupid customers stopped coming in,” and I feel the same about my kids coming into the kitchen. I’d have a clean house if it wasn’t for these grotty teenagers. So at dinner time, my kids get two choices, like it or lump it. My daughters usually swap the inedible contents of their lunchboxes for their unsuspecting school friends’ more tasty morsels.
I’ve written a comedy show about my lack of enthusiasm for being left in charge of catering, frankly it’s a job that I’m underwhelmed and ill-equipped to handle, but it has provided my children many opportunities to laugh at me. And made them good cooks.
I’d love you to bring foodie friends to my funny show as I embark on a quest to outsource the catering. You’ll laugh your guts up as I enlist the audience in my hunt for a personal cooking slave. This show contains bad cooking and more culinary disasters than a season of Gordon Ramsay, along with sensational stand-up and me singing a few tunes. If you’re tired of smashing your own avocados, come to Lou Pollard in Kids In The Kitchen for the 2017 Sydney Comedy Festival at Matchbox – The Factory Theatre, 105 Victoria Road Marrickville on Saturday 6th May at 5.45pm and Sunday 7 May 2017 at 4.45pm
Lou Pollard’s Looking For Mike Brady show is a joyous, wonderfully warped, true, raw romp through the minefields and thickets that beset dating, single parenthood and the predations of ageing.
**** Four stars – themusic.com.au
Why don’t you vote for me?
Not everyone in North Sydney would pay to meet Bronwyn Bishop.
This Thursday April 21st and Friday April 22nd, I’m performing my funny new show all about Australian politics, Vote One Lou Pollard at the Factory Theatre in Marrickville for the 2016 Sydney Comedy Festival. In this election year, come along and hear my crazy tales of politics in North Sydney.
When the other candidates are a joke, vote for the comedian
At 8.30pm tonight I’m performing my new show A Real State at The Factory Theatre in Marrickville, for three nights only. I’m hunting for a lovely new home and an audience to match. As a professional fool I wish I had a good job to pay for a mortgage, just like the well-known real estate guru Joe Hockey. I’m currently squashed into a scenic apartment with my three children overlooking the rent.
Fresh from my four-star reviewed Sydney Comedy Festival show Looking For Mike Brady, I’m performing in a tastefully renovated new show about home hunting away from the airport flight path in Sydney’s unreal estate market. This superbly crafted story is a moving show, in a call-the-removalists-the-lease-is-up-again kind of way.
Sophisticated solo parent seeks attractive audience positioned to ensure the perfect lifestyle experience. Bring yourself and any urban hipster double income professionals to this perfectly priced fun show about one woman’s quest to find a stunning family home. You’ll laugh your guts up as I enlist the audience in my hunt for a house, and maybe a husband too.
I’ve written a new stand-up comedy show called A Real State for the Sydney Fringe Comedy Festival. My first performance of this incredibly funny tribute to the sorry state of real estate in Sydney is on Tuesday September 22 at the Factory Theatre in Marrickville.
I’m hoping to see more than my friends and five dogs in the audience as tickets are very cheap. I’ve written new songs and a lot of new material and if I remember to be funny it will be a great night of laughs.
You can buy tickets here: A Real State comedy show
One month today I’ll be performing at the Enmore Theatre for Sydney Comedy Festival in my solo comedy show ‘Looking For Mike Brady.’ My show is all about what a hot catch I am for a wealthy architect (not really). Without an audience I’m not that funny (ask my children), so please come and see my show, it is yet another of my finely researched single mother get rich quick schemes.
Bring your best friends, good looking architects and Sam the Butcher, I’ll be at The Enmore Theatre for two nights, Wednesday April 29 and Friday May 1 at 9.30pm
Come along and see me act like a silly person on stage.
You can book tickets at: http://www.sydneycomedyfest.com.au/
In three weeks I’m performing my second solo stand up comedy show at The Factory Theatre, and I’m hoping more than four people and a dog come to see me perform. My show is called Looking For Mike Brady. Hopefully my future husband will be an architect like Mike Brady, because architects earn enough money to support a wife, 6 kids, a live in housekeeper, holidays in Hawaii and a big house. But knowing my luck with men, my future husband will probably be sitting in the audience disguised as a happily married gay man. I’ve written some silly songs and a whole lot of new material and if I can remember all of it I think it will be a great night of laughs. You can buy tickets here: sydneyfringe.com
On September 14 I’m performing two shows with my youngest daughter, who is hyperactive, smart and very cheeky. The rehearsal process has been ‘interesting,’ with Wednesday adding in bits of script that don’t make sense or are hilarious to her but not to me. I’m thinking our show will be a shambles or very funny (or both). Our show is called Parental Guidance and we’re on at Tap Gallery (upstairs theatre) in Darlinghurst. You can buy tickets at http://2013.sydneyfringe.com/event/comedy/parental-guidance
And an interview I did for the Sydney Fringe Festival blog