Thought for the day
Posted: May 18, 2011 Filed under: Thought For the Day | Tags: Augusten Burroughs Leave a commentThink of your head as an unsafe neighbourhood, don’t go there alone – Augusten Burroughs ‘Dry.
Share this:
Thought for the day – divorce
Posted: May 16, 2011 Filed under: D.I.V.O.R.C.E | Tags: DIVORCE, Kathy Lette Leave a commentWhy is divorce so expensive?
Because it’s worth it.
KATHY LETTE
Share this:
Children of single mothers
Posted: May 15, 2011 Filed under: Parenting, Single | Tags: baked beans, shoplifting, Single mothers Leave a commentAccording to some pop psychologists children of single parents grow up to be criminals. Great. My girls can start shoplifting some high quality items from David Jones, I am sick of eating baked beans.
Share this:
MAY 13 BIRTHDAYS
Posted: May 13, 2011 Filed under: Birthdays, LOVE, SONGS | Tags: birthdays, Daphne du Maurier, May 13 Birthdays, Stevie Wonder Leave a commentSTEVIE WONDER and DAPHNE du MAURIER
This man is a United Nations Messenger of Peace
Share this:
D.I.V.O.R.C.E prescription
Posted: May 13, 2011 Filed under: D.I.V.O.R.C.E, MARRIAGE, Single, SONGS | Tags: Basement Jaxx - Good Luck, DIVORCE, Greg Norman divorces, prescription, Sydney Swans Leave a commentYou’ve been dumped or you’ve dropped your ex. Divorcing the former love of your life is painful and can be costly. So you might not get over your marriage as quickly as Greg Norman but you need help to feel better right now.
It may take years to truly recover from your divorce. It does help if you get your doctor to give you a prescription. Something like:
Lou must watch the Sydney Swans train at the beach with their shirts off for at least six months until her trauma is healed.
Share this:
Parenting thought for the day
Posted: May 12, 2011 Filed under: Parenting, Thought For the Day | Tags: clowns, kids, parenting, pyjamas Leave a commentI wear pyjamas to work every day, My dad used to say “Are you wearing that for a bet?” because I used to go the pub with my friends dressed as a nun. On Saturday nights my girlfriends would be looking glamorous to get the guy and I’d be wearing a black smock and a crucifix. Now I’m a clown I get paid to look like a fruit loop at work, so the idea of going out in public dressed in a tutu has lost its appeal. And my nine year old and her ten year old best friend tell me that while kids can dress crazy, mums are only allowed to go a little nuts in their attire. There are standards that must be upheld. Don’t want to embarrass the kidlets do we? Especially before they’re teenagers. Hopefully I’m not the only mother who is trying to be a style icon my way.
Share this:
May 10 birthdays
Posted: May 10, 2011 Filed under: Birthdays, SONGS, Theme Songs | Tags: Fred Astaire, May 10 birthdays, Sid Vicious Leave a commentFRED ASTAIRE and SID VICIOUS
I hope they are having a joint birthday party in heaven, the music would be eclectic, but the dancing fabulous….
Share this:
Thought for the day
Posted: May 10, 2011 Filed under: Thought For the Day | Tags: Thought for the day Leave a commentThe best way to keep boys out of hot water is to put dishes in it.
Share this:
Cheap Mother’s guide to parties
Posted: May 9, 2011 Filed under: Birthdays, Parenting | Tags: Cheap birthday parties, cheap mothers Leave a commentWhen your kid is a bit older, say 10 or 11, write, “This is my first real birthday party” on the invitation. Coupled with a photo of your child looking forlorn, it will either spook the other parents completely so they don’t send their kid to the party (you can’t go, that child is a loser) – thus saving buckets of money on feeding and entertaining the little monsters. Or they will feel so bad for your child they will take out a second mortgage on their house to pay for a really cool present for your kid. That’s called a win-win situation.
Share this:
Happy Mother’s Day – A prayer for all the mothers
Posted: May 8, 2011 Filed under: Parenting | Tags: champion mothers, Child Support Agency, child support agency failings, dead beat dads, FREUD, happy single mothering, Homage to single mothers, maintenance payments, mental health of single mothers, MOTHER'S DAY, mothering when exhausted, PRAYER, real men pay child support, SANITY, single mother sanity, single mothering, single mothers with attitude, solo mothers Leave a commentAccording to Freud it’s the role of the mother to mess with the child’s psyche and I’ve been doing my share. So today I have a prayer that mothers can keep our sanity and sense of humour while parenting.
Today I got homemade craft for Mother’s Day and cards that read I love yu, you’re the bestest moummy in the hole world. Mother’s Day is well timed. Usually by May most mothers I know have had enough of child rearing thus Mother’s Day is planned so we don’t give up mothering and take the little blighters back to the pet shop.
May your day be filled with kisses.
May you go to the toilet in peace
May your day be a tantrum-free zone
And may Santa, The Easter Bunny and the tooth fairy take away the whinge-gene your children inherited from their father.
A PRAYER FOR SINGLE MOTHERS
May the dead beat dad finally give you some cash.
May your ex’s white trash girlfriend treat your kids well.
And may the Child Support Agency catch up with those who are avoiding their maintenance payments.
AMEN
loupollard 