I get invited to all the best parties
Posted: April 1, 2016 Filed under: COMEDY | Tags: 21st century crime, April Fools' Day, Australian Federal Police, best offer I've had today, invited to court, law enforcement, single mother adventures, single mother fun, spammers, wild single mothers 2 Comments|
The Australian Federal Police is a progressive and multi-faceted law enforcement organisation taking a strong lead in the fight against 21st century crime. |
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You have been invited to the court
You are invited to the law court by the judge because of offense against the law.
Please visit nearest police office or view case notices. You must provide all the necessary information to the Court within 18 days, starting from the time at which this message was received. If the information is not provided, the court can take place without your participation. The nature of the AFP and what is required of it, has changed significantly in recent years. The AFP has responded to a rapidly changing environment and this has required a greater focus on national and international operations. The new challenges the AFP faces include counter terrorism, human trafficking and sexual servitude, cybercrime, peace operations, protection and other transnational crimes. You have the right to request a correction of your personal information under the Privacy Act. The AFP is required to make the corrections to your personal information if it is reasonable to do so. The AFP does not provide your personal information to other Australian or foreign law enforcement, intelligence, security or government agencies, organisations or individuals unless the disclosure is authorised by the AFP Act and the Privacy Act, or is otherwise required or authorised by law. This is an automatically generated message: unsubscribe. Can’t wait to hear about my crime |
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Smothering
Posted: January 30, 2016 Filed under: Self improvement, Single Motherhood | Tags: Advice for single mothers, back to school 2016, celebrity gossip, internet blockers, Nick Lowe-Cruel To Be Kind -1979, parenting, single mom advice, single mother fun, single mother instructions, single mother tips, single mothering, social media addiction, watching people playing Minecraft Leave a commentAs the childrens head back to school after the long summer holidays I have turned into tyrant mother. I’ve installed software that cuts off the internet, which is a shame because it is really cutting into my time-wasting watching inane crap on social media therapy. I am not the first parent to use the cruel to be kind parenting method (patent pending), but in the digital age us parents need help to conquer the gazing at pointless clips on youtube disease that has spread amongst our kids. My youngest loves watching people playing Minecraft. WTF? I guess that’s no different to my secret joy at reading celebrity gossip and looking at pictures of Brad and Angelina and pretending I have that kind of fantasy family life. My 13-year-old is so sleep deprived from reading all the late night messages from her friends I had to stage an intervention. She told me not to cut off the internet so she could complete her homework but I figure if she hasn’t done it by 10 at night it’s too late. I’m hoping my little technological helper will enable me to have a more rested and harmonious household. My gal may even read one of the novels she is supposed to study this year and I may get some work done.
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Smotherhood
Posted: January 21, 2016 Filed under: Single Motherhood | Tags: AC/DC - Jailbreak (Live with Bon Scott), counting the days until kids go back to school, end of school holidays, single mom dreams, single mother ambitions, single mother fun, single mother getaway, single mother sanity, Single motherhood, Smotherhood, solo mothering 2 CommentsFights, tears and 210 hours of Monopoly later, I’m in a school holiday daze. I’m the head of my children’s entertainment committee and the acting head of catering but I’m looking forward to retirement from both those roles. Cooking is a chore and shouting, “get off the bloody computer” is becoming dull.
I have run out of low budget activities and if I read one more clean wholesome nutritious paleo educational fun advice for the latter part of the school holidays post on social media, I’ll scream at the smug happily married financially savvy yummy mummies who write them. Sigh. Next week I return to the tyranny of the school run. So much to look forward to in 2016. Today I am turning up the Ackadacka and dreaming of escape.
loupollard 