Tears dry on their own
Posted: September 14, 2013 Filed under: ART, Birthdays, SONGS | Tags: Amy Winehouse, Amy Winehouse - Wake Up Alone, English singers, great female singers, September 14 birthdays 2 CommentsAmy Winehouse would have been 30 today.
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RU OK?
Posted: September 12, 2013 Filed under: AUSTRALIA, Self improvement | Tags: ask your friends and neighbours RU OK?, Don Ritchie OAM, Gavin Larkin, Gavin Larkin legacy, great Australians making a difference, helping others, Mental health, national day of action, National RU OK day, RU OK, start a conversation, suicide prevention Leave a commentRU OK Day is a national day of action in Australia which aims to reduce suicide by encouraging people to connect with each other and ask “RU OK?” I have dear friends whose lives have been deeply affected by family suicide and I have seen the pain left behind.
R U OK? Day was inspired by the death of Barry Larkin (1940 – 1995). Barry was a fascinating and successful business management consultant who took his own life. His son Gavin Larkin (1968-2011) partnered with television producer Janina Nearn in 2008 to develop a campaign that would inspire Australians to stay connected and support people doing it tough.
R U OK?Day was launched in 2009 in Canberra. R U OK? is dedicated to Barry and all people who have died through suicide, and to the family and friends who love them. Please visit: www.ruokday.com
Reach out and try to help, a conversation could save a life. Who will you ask?
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Maybe we’ll grow
Posted: September 12, 2013 Filed under: Birthdays, Thought For the Day | Tags: best friends for life, Bonne Anniversaire, John Legend - Ordinary People Leave a commentJoyeux anniversaire a mon cher ami
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50 and shifty
Posted: September 9, 2013 Filed under: LOVE, MARRIAGE | Tags: 50th birthday, aging disgracefully, Dusty Springfield, Elvis impersonators, hold him and kiss him and love him, Las Vegas, Marriage, milestones, no regrets, pink haired old ladies, sports cars for the desperate and dateless, Wishin' an' hopin' Leave a commentI dreamed a dream in time gone by…. As my birthday nears I am thinking of what I want to do with the rest of my life. When I turn 50 (in about 20 years) I will dye my hair pink, drive a sports car and be married by an Elvis impersonator in Las Vegas. I just have to catch me a husband who will behave himself. I will sing my own song and never, ever eat celery again.
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Seriously
Posted: September 5, 2013 Filed under: ART, COMEDY, Parenting | Tags: celebrating kids with learning difficulties, comedy shows with kids, Lou Pollard comedy shows, Lou Pollard in Parental Guidance., mother and daughter comedy shows, Parental Guidance from children, performing monkeys, silly shows for kids, silly shows with kids, Sydney Fringe Festival 2013, Sydney Fringe Festival shows, Tap Gallery Sydney Leave a commentW.C. Fields was a wise man. He said that one should never work with children or animals. Next week I’m performing two comedy shows with my youngest daughter who is 8 years old, with the energy of a mad monkey. The rehearsal process was going so, ahem, well, that now my 11 year old daughter has stepped in to help us. You can see our show on Saturday September 14 2013 at Tap Gallery theatre (upstairs) in Darlinghurst (at 2pm and 4pm). Two years ago, I performed with my youngest at Woodford Folk Festival when she was only six, and she stole the show. At one point she threw stuff at the audience, she was hilarious. I must be a sucker for punishment, because when she suggested we do more shows together I said yes. I’ve written, rehearsed and am about to perform the show with someone who is bonkers, and not on Ritalin. And her big sister has turned into the stage control freak, thank God. Anyone got a wild pig we can borrow for our show?
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You want me to buy what?
Posted: September 2, 2013 Filed under: Self improvement, Single | Tags: Facebook bots are watching me, Facebook consultants, Facebook robots, finding a mate through social media, ignite the flames of love, Mad World - Gary Jules, melt unwanted fat, Michel Gondry, old, single, single mother fears, social media sales pitches, social media weight loss ads, somebody's trying to tell me something, targeted marketing campaigns, Tears For Fears songs, Tedious advertising campaigns, twitter trolls, wrinkly 4 CommentsDear Facebook I may not be old, single and wrinkly.
As a single mother busting my butt to promote my gigs I’ve recently become a social media whore bag. And Facebook has responded by stalking me with two kinds of ads. Ignite the flame of love again and lose some weight ye old fatty boom bah. Is Facebook trying to give me a hint? Facebook keeps filling my news feed with lots of ads that read something like this:
Try the trick that worked for this 470-year-old wrinkle free woman. Chopping off her head. Want more tips for wrinkle free skin?
Mums aged 90+ are losing all their flabby bits with this simple trick:
Amputation
Melt unwanted belly fat, extra bosoms and your large arse with a fat melting tool called an iron. Ladies you can get rid of 67% of wrinkles by ironing your face. And shave off 10 years of wrinkles by shaving off your craggy old facial skin because wrinkle free is all you want as a woman.
Mums who are 75 but look 7 are losing weight and losing their brain cells and muscle tone by the minute. Maybe I can add to my single mother’s pension by selling these attractive supplements?
Can you drop six dress sizes in a week? I can drop four dresses of different sizes at Vinnie’s in about five minutes.
Maybe I’ve already lost 47kg in six weeks. Maybe I’m really toned, tanned and terrific. Did you even think about that Facebook robot people? Maybe I’ve already found the secrets to a hot bod.
When I’m not being told I’m old and ugly Facebook are helping me to find my soul mate or trying to help me keep my one true love.
How to make your guy really love you, you can become hopeless and irresistible around Alpha males reads their latest ad.
I’m so excited. I will find a Facebook consultant (yes they exist) to help me and very soon I’ll be pretty and skinny and wrinkle free with the love of my life.
All this at the same time as emails proclaiming FREE ACCESS TO LOCAL SLUTS arrive in my inbox every day. I read one of these emails and as a very single mother I was disappointed to see that my name was not on their list of local slappers.
Hopefully my next social media highlight will be some nasty Twitter trolls calling me a filthy old tart.
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The robbed that smiles steals something from the thief
Posted: August 31, 2013 Filed under: Self improvement | Tags: Carole Bayer Sager - You're Moving Out Today (1977), freedom, Hope, moving on from people with NPD, my life and I can do what I like with it, Othello Act I Scene III, overcoming DV, resilience, single ladies, singledom, survival, William Shakespeare quotes Leave a commentToday I’m celebrating four years of freedom.
Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance - Oscar Wilde
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Trashy fash
Posted: August 27, 2013 Filed under: Single Motherhood | Tags: anti ageing propaganda, anti fashion, Biorhythm energy level: Chewed up and spat out, Flight Of The Conchords – Fashion Is Danger, single mother fashion disasters, Trash and treasure, trashy single mothers Leave a commentGucci sunglasses from Vinnies? Check.
Pyjamas from K-Mart? Check.
Havaianas Thongs? Check.
Single mother biorhythm energy level: Chewed up and spat out.
Trashy single mother reporting for duty at the school gate. I’d love to look fancy like all the yummy mummies at my school with their beautiful hair but I really don’t give a rats. Blame my 80s childhood, then my 90s grungey youth. Where I grew up every mother wore beige and navy Country Road separates, so as a result I’m allergic to fashion marketing. I think if women spent less time looking at handbags we’d have more time to change the world. The older I get the more I know that anti wrinkle cream is a useless weapon in our fight for equality. Maybe my look is called old bag trashion. I’m doing motherhood my way. Thank you Frank Sinatra.
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Never work with children, they’re animals
Posted: August 24, 2013 Filed under: ART, COMEDY | Tags: #culturerebel, comedy shows with kids, lots of fun that is funny, Lou Pollard comedy shows, mother and daughter clown shows, never work with children, Parental Guidance show for big kids and little kids, showbiz adages, Sydney Fringe Festival 2013, wild kids, working with my daughter Leave a commentOn September 14 I’m performing two shows with my youngest daughter, who is hyperactive, smart and very cheeky. The rehearsal process has been ‘interesting,’ with Wednesday adding in bits of script that don’t make sense or are hilarious to her but not to me. I’m thinking our show will be a shambles or very funny (or both). Our show is called Parental Guidance and we’re on at Tap Gallery (upstairs theatre) in Darlinghurst. You can buy tickets at http://2013.sydneyfringe.com/event/comedy/parental-guidance
And an interview I did for the Sydney Fringe Festival blog
http://blog.sydneyfringe.com/parental-guidance-breaking-the-first-rule-of-showbiz/
Wednesday and I
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undead
Posted: August 20, 2013 Filed under: Thought For the Day | Tags: angel of death, beautiful cemeteries, fascination with death, gravestones, history, I see dead people, mortality, Nick Cave featuring PJ Harvey– ‘Henry Lee’, old cemeteries, scenic cemeteries, stories from beyond the grave 4 CommentsOne of my friends said,
“You have a morbid fascination with death. You have so many stories of death and people close to you dying.” Actually he said, “You are the angel of death,” but I don’t fear death and I don’t think it’s morbid. I work in hospitals with kids who may die and observing parents coping with their worst fear strengthens my gratitude for my three healthy kids. Life and death walk hand in hand, two sides of the same coin, my fascination with death is a part of living well. And I know I will be old and ready for it when my time comes. I’ve got too much to do in this life to die young.
I love cemeteries, I could walk in them for hours looking at the headstones and wondering how people lived. I’m lucky I live right near one of the most beautiful cemeteries in Sydney. I love old graves. Walking around reading the inscriptions I’m reminded as a mother that only a hundred years ago mothers lived with the ever present thought that they should have lots of children as many little kids under five didn’t survive.
My dad’s been dead for 11 years and I’m certain he’s around me all the time.
beautiful cemetery
loupollard 