I’m moving to China

China’s singletons celebrate Singles Day (or ‘bare sticks’) as an alternative to Valentine’s Day on November 11 — or 11/11, the date representing all the lonely people. Being single on Valentine’s Day is a big problem in China, where there are millions more men than women because of the country’s one-child policy. Sitting on the bus with no one beside me is fun, but I’d love to celebrate being alone with other sad singles, is anyone throwing a blind date party tonight?


A moment so rare

Three short years ago we were dressing up and celebrating your 40th birthday. You were the Queen of the ball that night and now you’ve already left us. And the only way I can contact you is to turn on Smooth FM and wait until a really corny tune comes on and sing my heart out like we used to do together when we were in your car or trying to outdo each other at karaoke. We miss you so, precious sunshine, funny witty friend, devoted mother. I see you when the sun lights up the evening sky across the sea and your songs come on the radio. Shine on beautiful friend, thank you for inspiring me to do good work in the world


Magnificent moments in mothering part 576

In a rush to get to work a few weeks ago I forgot to send my youngest child to a school excursion in the rain with a few minor details: a) a raincoat b) sensible shoes c) a water bottle d) a back pack she could carry e) an umbrella I may as well have sent her in the nude. Beautiful goddess teacher dressed her in garbage bag couture so my girl stayed dry and shared some of her water with my child. Thank God for teachers and their ability to do what is best for the child, I worship them all. And there was no email to the silly mother saying, ‘you are a goose, what were you thinking?’ Today on World Teachers’ Day (UN approved) I’d like to thank my children’s teachers for everything they have done to enable my kids to be functioning members of society. They work hard for little pay and inspire our kidlets in so many ways. Teachers I love youse all. I am so lucky to be a part of a caring school community. Frank Sinatra – (Would You Like To) Swing On A Star


Thank you for your smile

Goodbye our sunny, lovely friend. Some people are sent into our lives to remind us to smile, give our love freely and take pleasure in the simple things. Thank you for the joy and the sunshine you brought us, we will miss your beautiful face

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-KPGh3wysw


Does my sassiness upset you?

Dear Maya Angelou, the world is a poorer place without you. Thank you for the love, wisdom and joy your writing brought us. Your words gave me hope in the darkest days of my life. Your strength and dignity in the face of life’s challenges are an inspiration.


My favourite daughter is…..

When I was pregnant with The One Who Changed Everything I read a memoir by Isabel Allende called Paula, written about her daughter. Until I read the book I’d been in massive ‘motherhood won’t change me’ denial about my gal’s impending birth, but I knew afterwards that I was about to embark on a life changing journey. After an exhausting start, a little girl called V opened me up to the beauty and joy and suffering in the world, she showed me the way.

Happy 17th birthday Vee-Yon-Say, so glad I am your mama. Thank you for your wisdom, your light and your humour. I know I am the Eddy to your Saffy, I love you smarty pants


Thank you Stevie

Thank you for your music, you truly are a wonder.


I’m your mother, I’m supposed to drive you crazy

Flowers, chocolates, cards, a new house and a new car, my kids know how to spoil me on Mother’s Day, but apparently today they forgot what I really like so they got me some soap. And candles so that my cheeky youngest child, who is a trainee fire starter, can melt wax all over the house. Joy. And as it is Mother’s Day I am supposed to smile sweetly and be grateful and pretend that it doesn’t bother me, otherwise in a few years they will relocate me to a home for the bewildered that plays Phil Collins songs all day. Sigh. Motherhood is so glamorous and exciting isn’t it? Rest up today mamas, it’s going to be a big year


Pretendo

A woman said to me at a party recently, “You really have to get it right when you’re picking the husband who is going to be the father of your children.” I wanted to punch her in the face and say, ‘thanks so much for reminding me that I’m a really bad picker. That’s why I went out of my way to choose someone who refuses to support his children.”

I’m such a bad picker it is best that I only have imaginary boyfriends. Last night as I reheated old beans for dinner, I said to I-mag boyfriend, ‘where are you when I need you?’ My fantasy boyfriend makes the bed, buys me expensive restaurant meals, takes out the garbage and doesn’t mind that I am a professional fool.

Maybe us old feminist gals don’t have time for in-real-life boyfriends. How can we plan the revolution when we’re busy whispering sweet nothings into someone’s hairy ear? Luckily social media saved me from my mad late night musings and I didn’t have to be depressed and alone for too long. Another new boyfriend sent me a Facebook message at midnight which just about saved my life:

Hello,I’m Justin jack ,an Engineer live in England a divorcee.Your profile caught my attention! You look so cute and charming, saw your profile and was moved with what i saw. I will like to know you more.I want to learn more about you.I wait for your response.

Oh yippee!

TLC – No Scrubs


Sail Away With Me To Another World

I woke up this morning thinking of my gorgeous, generous friend and the times she and I would sing karaoke. We’d work our way through rock ballads, fabulous country songs, Patsy, Tammy, then Whitney and of course Dolly Parton. My funny friend also introduced me to the delights of Smooth FM and their back catalogue of hideous one hit wonders. A couple of years ago we gatecrashed an 18th birthday party at a pub and then it turned out C knew the family! She was there for me when I became a single mother and I didn’t know how I would cope. She showed me that single motherhood can be fun. Her funeral is today and I don’t think it’s right that two little girls don’t have their fabulous, funny mum any more. At 42 years old my beautiful friend had so much more to give, more books to write, many more songs to sing. Fly free my darling, your spirit soaring with the sun and the twinkling stars, thank you for your friendship. We will walk with your girls through this life. Love you, love always, always love

When to the sessions of sweet silent thought
I summon up remembrance of things past,
I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought,
And with old woes new wail my dear time’s waste:
Then can I drown an eye, unus’d to flow,
For precious friends hid in death’s dateless night,
And weep afresh love’s long since cancell’d woe,
And moan the expense of many a vanish’d sight:
Then can I grieve at grievances foregone,
And heavily from woe to woe tell o’er
The sad account of fore-bemoaned moan,
Which I new pay as if not paid before.
But if the while I think on thee, dear friend,
All losses are restor’d and sorrows end.