I’m Not Bossy, I’m The Boss
Posted: March 19, 2015 Filed under: ART, LOVE, SONGS | Tags: exciting times, great Irish musicians, great Irish writers, How About I Be Me and You Be You?, Irish singers, love, powerful female fire horses, Sinead O'Connor, Sinead O'Connor - Feel So Different, single mothers with attitude Leave a commentAs a financially-challenged single mother I don’t usually have the money to buy myself special presents but last Christmas I made an exception. I’ve waited more than 25 years to see the sassy, funny, extraordinary Sinead O’Connor and tonight I’m going to the Sydney Opera House to hear her live. Her music has helped me through some really tough times and I cannot wait to see her up close.
Step on a crack, break your mother’s back
Posted: March 13, 2015 Filed under: FEMINISM, Parenting, Raising Hell, Single Motherhood | Tags: "Get Lucky" by Daft Punk, Advice for single mothers, bad luck, black cats, breaking mirrors, Daft Punk - Get Lucky ft. Pharrell Williams First Live Performance HD @ HTC live, Friday the 13th, lucky, lucky mothers, single mother ethical dilemmas, single mothers getting lucky, spill salt, superstitions, walk under ladders, we're up all night to get lucky Leave a commentAs it is Friday the 13th, please children don’t let your single mothers
Catch a bus
Feed a black pussy cat
Climb a tree
Open the fridge
Break a mirror
Cook dinner
Spill salt
Make a bed
Log out of Tinder
Wash clothes
Leave the couch
Walk under a ladder
Or stop dancing
Because it is very, very unlucky
#childrenmusthelptheirmothers
Gurls germs
Posted: March 8, 2015 Filed under: FEMINISM, Single Motherhood | Tags: Because I Am A Girl, brave and smart girls, funny and clever girls, girl gangs, girl power, International Women's Day, love not war, Queen Latifah - U.N.I.T.Y., single mother joy, single mothering daughters, smart funny fabulous girls Leave a commentI’m a single mother of girly girls so I’m fluent in lipstick, Bratz dolls and emotional meltdowns. I don’t speak a word of Transformers, Thomas the tank engine or Minecraft, my gals are not interested. Girl children like to talk a lot, every thought has to be workshopped, discussed and dissected. It’s emotionally exhausting but I don’t think I could have been a mother to boy children. Too many trains and trucks and cars and not enough cross dressing and emotional awareness. I love my gurl kids even though they wear me out. My job makes me grateful to have well children whether they are pink or blue or rainbow, but I do believe that if more girls were in positions of power we would have less conflict in the world, less war, less militaristic decision making. So boys, you’ve had your turn, there’s a few of us gals who are tired of the world turning into an angry hate-filled space; one day our girls are going to take over and change the dominant paradigm forever.
Seven signs you’re a single mother
Posted: February 20, 2015 Filed under: Single Motherhood | Tags: single mother ethical dilemmas, single mother euphemisms, single mother expense rorts, single mother fashion, single mother giveaways, single mother lexicon, single mother proverbs, single mother style, single mums with attitude, Siouxsie And The Banshees - Happy House Leave a comment1) Your flat mates keep asking you to drive them to school
2) You have 50 cents in your wallet
3) Your kids have eaten three kilos of fruit before you’ve even left the supermarket fruit and veg section
4) You don’t have a husband
5) Every item in your wardrobe is made of cougar, puma or leopard print fabric
6) Your kids’ most oft used sentence is, “Mum is your job cash in hand?”
7) Your youngest child says, “This would be a good dress for you to catch a husband in,” only in crowded shops
Just me?
Happy Go Ahead Date A Single Mother Day
Posted: February 14, 2015 Filed under: LOVE | Tags: Hope, joy, Katie Melua - Closest Thing To Crazy, looking for love, love, presents for single mothers, Sexy single mothers, single mother celebrations, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day for singles Leave a commentHere’s my sweet, romantic poem in honour of Valentines Day:
Roses are red, violets are blue
I didn’t get a thing today so f#*^! you
Were the flower delivery trucks parked at your door when you awoke? Did you hire someone to manage the line of men? I bet I received a better present than you today. I received self raising flour, drinking chocolate, a crumpled UNO card and bubbles (in the bath when my daughter farted)
What else did I get for Valentines Day?
Emotional turmoil – check
Feeling forlorn – check
Eviction notice – check
Sad, lonely and blue – check
When I was coupled up I didn’t get Valentine’s presents. I got the kids and he kept the used woman from the second hand stall at the markets.
Are you spoken for? Spoken about? Taken or taken for granted?
A FAIRY TALE FOR SINGLE MOTHERS
Posted: February 1, 2015 Filed under: LOVE, Single Motherhood | Tags: big bad wolf, blended families, fairy tales for single mothers, husband hunting, Lana Del Rey - Wolf, single mother delusions, single mother dreams, single mother ethical dilemmas, single mother fantasies, single mothers repartnering, single mothers with attitude 1 CommentARE YOU MY HUSBAND?
A single mother left her babies in the nest with a teenager in charge. The kids screamed so the mother left in a hurry.
“Damn,” said the mother. “I’d like to find a husband. I’ll be back.”
So away she went, a long way from the deep dark suburbs.
She did not know what her husband looked like. He might have walked right by her. She did not see him.
Where is my husband?
She looked at the golf course. She saw a sporty young man in a golf buggy. Are you my husband?
The young man just stared at her like she was deranged.
The sporty man was not her husband so she walked on.
Then she came to a pub. She saw a pot bellied drunk at the bar.
“Are you my husband?” She said to the man.
“Me wife kicked me out, I could be your hubby,” he said.
“No, you are a yobbo, you are not my husband.
The pot-bellied drunk was not her husband. The young sporty man was not her husband. Where is my husband?
She came to a strip club. She saw a man who looked sharper than a rat with a gold tooth sitting in a booth.
“Are you my husband?’ she said to the man.
“I could be your husband tonight baby, “ said the man.
“No, you are not my husband, you are a player,” she said.
She looked on the Internet. She found a man whose photo was 20 years old.
“How could you be my husband?” He replied. “I am gorgeous and you are an old cougar.”
“Where is my husband? Where could he be? I will have a husband, I will, I know I will find him”
The single mummy ran, she saw a road worker showing his bum crack. No! He was not her husband. She ran on and on.
She called to a good-looking older man, but he did not stop, he went right on.
The mummy walked on and on. “Where am I?” said the mummy, “I want to go home.”
So the single mummy went home and when she got to her front gate, the mummy saw a cute man visiting her neighbours.
“There he is, there is my husband!” she said.
“Do you know who I am?” said the cute man.
‘Yes, you are not a yobbo, you are not a player, you are not too young for me, you are not too old for me, you are not too good looking, you are cute and you are my husband.”
And they lived happily ever after in separate houses keeping their five children from three different marriages at arm’s length.
THE END
Straya Day
Posted: January 26, 2015 Filed under: AUSTRALIA | Tags: Australia Day, Australian Culture, Australian customs, Australian National cuisine, goodonyamate, interracial harmony, multi cultural Australia Day, Our Island Home, Sorry Day, speaking Strine Day, Vegemite, Vegemite - Australian TV commercial Leave a commentToday is our day Oz Traya, there is so much to celebrate; it’s our Invasion Day, Ripper Bewdy Day, Celebrate our Unity Day, Chuck a Few Tinnies Down and Get on The Back of a Kangaroo Day, Call For Reconciliation Day, Our Home Is Girt By Sea Day, When Do We Get a Treaty Day, Colonial Day, Get Smashed Day, White Australia has a Black History Day, Another Public Holiday Day, White Slavery Day, Be Grateful For Where We Live Day, Our Island Home Day, Celebrate MultiCulturalism Day, Massacre of the Oldest Living Culture Day
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yA98MujNeM

